This is your act of worship

He brought me to the desert to dance and sing...
He brought me to this desert to break these chains!
This is my spiritual act of worship...
To dance and sing... even in the depths of the night.

I will dance and sing...
wave my flag high.
Let  FREEDOM Reign.  Let FREEDOM Reign.
I will dance and sing...
praise this Glorious King.

He brought me to the desert to dance and sing...
Oh how I love Him.  Oh how I love Him.
Jesus in this place.

Today is...

TODAY IS 10-11-12!!!
 I found this funny!
 :-) :-) :-)

He Loves me. He loves me not.

As a little girl, I can remember walking outside on my grandfather's farm and picking flowers, mostly daisies.  They were white with yellow centers and they were the wild kind.  The farm there had rolling hills, with a few old rusty grain silos parched on them.  As a child, I used to wander around the farm, day dream, and make up songs/stories (what most 5-6 year olds do :-D).  I can remember getting lost in thought on those rolling hills, which seemed much bigger than what they really were.  I used to sit behind the grain silos and pick the wild daisies that grew right up against the rusty walls.  I often would pick a few other wild flowers along the way too.  My young curious mind, would often wander to the thoughts of God.  While playing on the farm,  I often would sing my thoughts to God.  I'm not sure if this is normal for a 5 year old, but maybe God was making me into a "David."  As I picked those daisies, I would always ask God... "Do you love? Do you love me not?"  Then I would begin to pick each pedal off the flower, while saying or singing...

Pedal #1  "He loves me."
Pedal #2  "He loves me not."
Pedal #3  "He loves me."
Pedal #4  "He loves me not."
....
....
....

I would often get to the very last pedal and most of the time it would be...

Last Pedal #...   "He loves me!"

... but on the times that it wasn't I would ALWAYS "make up" an extra pedal and say...

Last Pedal #... "Yep, He loves me!"

I would then smile up at Heaven and feel absolutely LOVED!

Even as a child, I always knew the love of God.  It was never really explained to me at this age but something in my child-like heart knew that there was a Father out there who extravagantly loved me. I knew that in his flower making skills there was no such pedal for me called "He loves me not."
I knew His Love as I walked on those rolling hills.
I knew His Love when I sat along that grain silo.
I knew His Love when I walked along that big creek, which now seems more like a stream.
I knew His Love when I picked those daisies.
I knew His Love when I sang to Him ... "He Loves me.  Yes, He loves me."

"Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God!"  1 John 3:1

Today as I was shopping, I came across this treasure.  I was brought immediately back to my grandfather's farm and my days of daisy picking.  I was reminded just how much God loves me.  He really really loves me!

American Dream

I had a dream last night in which I was house shopping. I was walking around a neighborhood with quite a few number of houses.  Every house looked the same except for the different sizes of the yards.  I was alone and without a realtor.  I came to this one specific house.  I walked in and began to walk around.  As I was walking around the house looking at the rooms, I came into the kitchen, which was in the very center of the house.  There was a familiar friend from my childhood in the kitchen.  He was sitting at the kitchen table (kitchen island) on a bar stool, which was in the middle of the kitchen.  As I approached him, he began telling me how he and his wife had bought a house just like this house and it was in the very same neighborhood.  He then took me to look at their house.  To get there, we walked around a small pond in the neighborhood while passing a few other homes.  Their home was almost the same as the one I had originally looked at, but with just minor differences.  I then looked at the yard to see how big it was.  The yard was much smaller and closer to the other houses, the trees were also very close to their house.  I noticed in the dream that all the houses looked the same.  I then looked at my friend and told him that I wanted to buy the first house. I said... "It is what I want."  I then woke up.

As I thought about this dream, I was surprised why I would ever want to buy a house like this.  In the dream, the house was not beautiful although it was not ugly either.  It was not unique but it was very similar to all the other houses in the dream.  It was small and simple, a little boring.  The only difference from my house compared to my friend's house was that it had a bigger yard. I was not really impressed by the appearance, size of rooms, yard size, uniqueness, or character of the house.  Yet I still stated that I wanted to buy the house. Why?  I prayed about this dream today and the interpretation of it.

I felt that God was talking to me about the so called "American Dream."  I believe that God has given me a choice of how I can live my life.  To the average American it may seem like the thing to do.  Most might settle down, buy a small-adverage house-in a small neighborhood, along a small pond.  Most people might actually be content with their average lifestyle.  For years they might even say... "this is what I want."  This is exactly what I said in my dream.  As I said this in the dream, my heart felt something completely different.  Although these words came from my mouth, my heart was not satisfied with the decision.  I awoke thinking... "Why on Earth would I settle for the average lifestyle?"  I personally don't think that God was specifically speaking to me about buying a house but that the house was symbolic for the "normal" American lifestyle.  God has given me a choice of what lifestyle I may live.  There are two options to choose from: The path that most people take, the so called American Dream with an average life, average neighborhood, average house, average yard, average pond, and average family or the path less traveled into the unknown, living in random countries, random cities, random cultures, unknown houses, among unknown or different languages, and with the unknown of when the family may come, if by chance it ever does.

One path seems average and the other path seems random & risky.
One dream seems contentful and the other dream seems unknown.
One home seems small and grounded and the other home seems limitless and vast beyond the oceans.
One seems so stagnant and the other seems so fruitful in new seasons.
One seems to be walking by sight and yet the other seems to be walking by faith.

I have to admit, I like the latter.  This is my path. This is my dream. This is my home.
"This is what I want."


Somehow I can't help but think of the path less traveled. :-)

that chosen to be close to God one

I want to be that chosen to be close to God one

To hear Your Voice
To feel Your Nearness
To see Your Face
And to know Your Gaze

Because I want to be that chosen to be close to God one

To look in to the night sky and know The One who created each star
To walk along the oceans and know The Man who filled them up
To look upon mountain tops and know The Master Painter
And to step into different seasons and know The Changer of them all

I want to be that chosen to be close to God one

To walk into a different nation and know You ~The One Father of them all
To step into the darkest places and know that You have already gone before me
To look into the face of strangers and to exchange a glance through Your Eyes
And to love others through the love that You have chosen to love me

Because I want to be that chosen to be close to God one
God choose me

33rd street & 3 more days

Today has been a strange day.  What should I expect though when I pray "God show up!"  Last night I prayed that God would show up during my travels, that He would surprise me with His Presence and signs. :-)  This morning I prayed that again... but I might have rephrased it... "God show up in Paris today! (I have this thing with Paris-but then who doesn't right?)  Now I sit and ask myself "why am I surprised on my strange day?"  Maybe in the midst of all the confusion I had forgotten my prayer.

I got up this morning and began last minute packing to head back to the UAE, for my 3rd year teaching at Almaha Primary School.  I packed everything all nice, neat, and orderly.  Funny how packing to go back is a lot neater than it was to come.  I had everything all packed by 11:00am and I had time to pray with one of my roomies for the upcoming year-new beginnings for both of us.  How great it is to bless friends in prayer and receive prayer.  Truly this is the family of God that I love so much, a praying family.  

I then checked (through my phone) my flight departure time.  Yes, I have to say that I'm a proud owner of a new iphone-4S.  It has been my new toy for the week that has consumed only a little of my time. ;-) The departure time read 4:35pm, Aug. 30th.  My other room-mate and I planned on leaving for the airport 3 hours before my fly time.  

On the way to the airport, we lifted up prayers. :-)  She specifically prayed for God to show me that I was not traveling alone.  She also prayed for favor, favor, favor, and for new beginnings.  I then lifted her up in prayer.  My friend's car started acting funny as we were driving.  All of a sudden I just had this peace in me.  I said, "I'm okay if God has me not make it to the airport.  I am okay if God has me make it to the airport.  Whatever He wants to do, I am okay with. "  Then her car stopped acting funny.  As we pulled into the airport we ended our prayers and she helped me carry my very heavy luggage to the dock.  I really honestly didn't think I came with that much stuff but as I pulled it all out of her hatchback, even as neatly packed & orderly as it all was, it was def. not light.  Who knew that shoes & product could weigh that much!  I will admit that I love my shoes & hair products.  Although at times my heels seemed a bit inappropriate in KC, they may not have actually made it out of the suitcase in KC.   'sad-face' AnotherTime@AnotherPlace   

At the "check in dock" at KC International Airport, I placed my bags on the dock and passed the man my passport.  He looked at me strangely and said, "You should have been here 2 hours before for an international flight!"  I then showed him my phone because I had not printed the ticket out.  He told me my flight was departing at 3:00pm instead of 4:35pm.  I then proceeded to the American Airlines help desk.  As I was in line, there were some Arabs checking in as well.  The man carried one of my suitcases up to the counter for me.  It felt good to practice my arabic skillz again. "Shukran Jazilan" :-)  As I showed the American Airlines Clerk my flight schedule via@iphone (while pointing to the time of 4:35), she reached out and touched the screen.  It opened up the date which then changed the time to 3:00pm! No way I thought, "I missed my flight!"  She then said that there was another flight leaving tomorrow for Abu Dhabi and she said the flight difference would be a 2,000.00 dollars!  I immediately felt sick to my stomach and thought, "No way am I paying that amount for me missing my flight!"  She tried to look for another flight but for some strange reason the computer system was not working properly to look for flight prices.  She gave me the international number to call and we proceeded to the back to the car.

All the way home, I was in shock.  Basically, I was thinking I was leaving the country and then a "suddenly" happened.  I couldn't really blame it on the airlines and I couldn't really blame it on myself.  It was just a mistake that happened.  I got the time wrong but it wasn't really my fault.  I prayed for favor with the airline price.  I def. didn't want to fork out another 2,000.00 for a one way ticket! That was just out of the question.  Immediately 1 Thessalonians 5:18 came to my mind. "In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."  I then just began to praise God and thank Him out loud.  It went a little something like this... "Well I missed my flight, might have lost a lot of money! Praise God! Praise God!"  We than began to claim Romans 8:28 over the situation.  "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose."

As we came into the house, I called the 800 number to reschedule my flight.  I was put on hold, transferred, put on hold, put on hold, and then put on hold.  All the while, praying for patience, favor, and questioning why this was all happening.  The woman on the other line was trying to find me a reasonable fare because as it looked for the upcoming day the cost was still a 2,000.00 difference.  I waited for approximately 45-50 minutes on hold.  She came on and had found me a flight that would only cost an 80.00 difference for the beginning of next week!  I praised the Lord out-loud and thanked her numerous times!   I rejoiced more when getting off the phone.  Then thanked "the Lamb" numerous times! My friend then asked me what time it was.  I told her it's 5:33.  "Oh wow!" I said.  She said "does this number mean anything to you?"  It sure does! 5 is the number for Grace and the 33 is the number that God always shows me when He wants me to know that I am right where I am supposed to be at! It's like He's telling me He is with me!  She then proceeded to tell me something crazy!  She said... "funny thing but today when I was paying rent, I added up my rent,  plus the 22 days that you were here.  The total ended up coming to 333.24.  You gave me yours in cash and then I wrote the check for 333.24.  Since you are staying another 3 days at 11 dollars a day, you will owe 33 dollars when you leave!"  I couldn't believe it!  

To give you all a history of this 33 thing.  Ever since I left for the UAE 2 years ago, the Lord has been showing me 33's as signs to tell me I am in the right place or that He is with me.  I had a dream of going through a door w/the 33 on it.  When I opened the door I was in the ME.  The street sign outside of our home-group home in the UAE was 33rd st.  The house of prayer's address in Dubai is 33.  When on a trip to S. Africa, my arrival time was 3:33.  There are numerous other signs the past few years using the 33's that God has shown me.  Today is another day that the Lord has shown up saying "Do not worry, you are exactly where you are supposed to be at.  I am with you.

As I sit and type this, I look over at my luggage in the corner of the room. I can't help but say... "Wow, I can't believe I'm still here in KC!"   For some reason or another, I am still here and I am okay with that-as I prayed earlier.  Now I am reminded of all the other prayers... "God show up today.  Presence. Favor, favor, favor. May she know she is not traveling alone." Wow did God ever show up today!!! I also have yet another REAL Sunday in America, on Memorial Day weekend (for those who understand the Islamic weekends).  For this I rejoice and giggle... saying "I can't help but feel I should be on that plane right now... but then again, maybe not.  

Quote of the Day

"Victory begins with name of Jesus on your lips, but it will not be consummated until the nature of Jesus is in your heart." 

pondering

Today I had this phrase come into my mind... "Breaking the Stigma of Religion."

Our two different faces from my two second grade emirate classes.
Who says you can't be serious and silly? :-D

cut to the heart

The rare times when reading scripture, it cuts to your spirit, cuts to you soul, cuts to your heart.

"Those who were not my people I will call "My people,"

and her who was not beloved I will call "beloved."

And in the very place where it was said to them, "You are not My people,"

there they will be called "sons of the living God."

                                                         Romans 9:25 (Hosea 2:23)

When I read this today the impact of the reality hit me.  This is happening today.  This prophecy foretold about in the book of Hosea and re-quoted in Romans is happening in this very day.  It's happening corporately in nations and individually in personal lives.  When reading this today I was amazed at how alive God's Word stands.  His Words are Truth, they are Real.  They are Alive and Active in our very time.  I was cut to heart as I read this today. 

MERCIFUL is He who says to those who are not His people "you are Mine."

COMPASSIONATE is the One who sees the unloved one and says "You are My loved one."

ABOUNDING IN LOVE is the Father who claims children in a land who has been said they don't belong to Him.  He says ... "My sons & daughters come Home to Me."

Merciful, Compassionate, Abounding in Love... this is my God. This is my Beloved. This is my Father.  He is absolutely BEAUTIFUL and I love Him so much.

The Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi

"Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace.


Where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; and where there is sadness, joy.


O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved as to love.


For it is in giving that we receive; it is in pardoning that we are pardoned; and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.


Amen."

Heaven's Eyes

Choked up by reading Leif Hetland's book...


One or two put their heads in His bosom.  
 In His bosom, they feel honored.  
 On His lap, they feel safe.
 In His hands, they feel blessed.
 In His eyes, they feel loved.
 In His smile, they feel delighted in.


 And there on His lap, with that squirmy brood of children--so young, so innocent, so trusting--Jesus shows us a picture of the Kingdom of God with its King on His throne.  He places the least of these in the position of most honor, gathering them to His bosom and blessing them.


 Jesus knew exactly how they felt, and He fought back a nostalgic treat for the bosom of His Father that He had left so many years ago when He climbed down from the lap so we could climb up onto His."


Then they brought little children to Him, that He might touch them; but the disciples rebuked those who brought them.  But when Jesus saw it, He was greatly displease and said to them, "Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God.  Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it."  And He took them up in His arms, laid His hands on them, and blessed them.


Before Jesus left this earth to return to the bosom of the Father. He cried out to the Father.  The time was late at night; the place, the Garden of Gethsemane.  Once there, Jesus walked a little way beyond where He had left Peter, James, and John, then fell to the ground and praying.  The writer to the Hebrews describes the scene one of anguish, tears, and loud crying (Heb. 5:7).  What Jesus cried out was "Abba! Father! All things are possible for You; remove this cup from Me yet not what I will, but what You will (Mark 14:36).


What exactly is going on in that Garden?  Jesus is afraid.  He is crying, loudly, and for a time, uncontrollably.   Suddenly He is a little boy again, climbing onto His Papa's lap, trembling, reaching up, and desperately clinging to His neck.  Asking Him--no, begging Him--for a reprieve.  In essence He pleads, "Papa, please.  The cup is too heavy; it's contents, too bitter.  Do I have to take it?  Must I drink it?  Is there no other way?"


Though the answer is hard, the lap is soft, and the Father's arms bundle His Son against the chill of night--warming Him, assuring Him, calming Him.  What began in tears, ended in trust.  What began as a request, ended as a relinquishment.  What began as a way out for the Son, ended as the way of salvation for the world. 


All because of the Father's lap.


And because of the Son who sat there, wept there, surrendered there.

My prayer is that I can lean into the bosom of Jesus.
To lean into all of my brokenness and lean into the heart of this very Man, Jesus.
To come as the child He sees me as.
To sit upon the lap of Abba and be loved as I am, a child.

I hear the Lord saying... "Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them.  For the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to these little ones."

The Reality of it All

 I prayed a simple prayer "God, open my eyes to see what You see today, open my ears to hear what You hear today, and open my heart to feel what You feel today."

I then went about my day, went down stairs to Starbucks, picked the girls up for work, drove to school, taught my second grade class, discussed random things in the lunch staff room, worked w/my student teacher, complained about the air conditioning not working in our school (seriously was 104 degrees today), drove home from work, went for a run in the gym, and went to the grocery store.  As I was shopping for groceries something happened.

THE CAR WASHER
As I parked my car in the parking garage of LuLu's Supermarket/Grocery Store.  I was approached by a car washer.  For those who are not familiar w/things in the UAE, here's some information.  In every mall or shopping center that you go to, there are car washers.  They are there simply for the convenience of car washing.  It's fairly cheap, done while you shop, and you have a clean car with no hassle of waiting in line.  This sounds great but there may be a catch or price to pay.  Are we the one's paying the price or might it be the worker.  These workers are known as one of the many jobs classified as "labor workers."  I was approached by this kid, I say kid because he looked to be about 16-18 years old.  He was from Pakistan.

Car Washer:  "excuse me, car wash?"

Me: Thought not spoken~(I honestly prefer to get my car cleaned at the petrol station because they clean the inside of your car as well.)

Me:  "No thank you."

Car Washer: "Please Mam. Please Mam. Can I wash your car.  It won't take long."

Me: Thought not spoken~ (He must really be low on car washes.  What if he doesn't make that much? How much does he make?  How did he get here? What is his story?)

Me: Okay.  Yes you can wash my car.  How much?

Car Washer: 20 dirham

Me: Thank you. Please keep the change. God bless u.

Car Washer: Thank you

The reality shown to me was that he is a young man, who came to the UAE upon hearing of a better job, with high expectations, sending money home for his family, overworked and underpaid.

I then proceeded to walk towards the entrance of Lulu's thinking of the Car Washer.

THE LABOR WORKER
Upon entering the grocery store, I grabbed a cart and began my shopping.  I was walking in the freezer section and this Pakistani man was walking in front of me.  He was wearing a wrinkled white cotton dress shirt, short khaki colored trousers, and black plastic sandals.  His hair was combed back (damp still from a washing) and his skin was dark from the sun.  The word "modest" popped into my mind.  He was pulling his empty grocery basket behind him.  He was headed for the frozen vegetable section but hesitated.  Looking at the bags of frozen vegetables he hesitated again.  Then looking the opposite direction towards the fresh baked bread isle,  he transitioned to the bread section.  He grabbed a bag of the freshly baked arabic bread, stared at it for a minute, and placed it into the empty blue grocery basket.

As I stood behind this man watching his shopping, I couldn't help but notice his gentleness.  It was like I was being allowed to feel his character, if this is at all possible.  I could sense and feel his gentle spirit and softness.  I was wondering why he was hesitating but deep down inside I knew the answer to this question.  Looking back at the man, he placed the bread in his basket and chose not to go down the frozen vegetable section.  As I looked at this man, tears began to well up in my eyes.  My heart began to hurt.  God was allowing me for a minute to feel this man's reality.  He is a hardworking man, shopping for food, with a modest appearance, a man with a good character and a good heart.  He is a man far from home, far from his family, trying to make ends meet by sending money home to his loved ones, a man underpaid and over-worked.

As I thought these things, I looked down in my grocery cart and began to feel an onset of embarrassment.  I had things in my cart, that some might not be able to afford.  What a contrast it is to live in one of the most richest cities in the world but to have some of the most underpaid and overworked laborers.  I though to myself "here I am buying the necessities of the week (or so I think they are necessities) and here this man might only be able to buy the bare minimals."  At this moment, I immediately lost my appetite for grocery shopping.  Maybe this is one of the reasons why I hate grocery shopping in the UAE so much.  I wanted to immediately push my grocery cart to the side and just walk out of the grocery store.  Why I didn't, I'm unsure of.  I assume that it would leave more work for some of the workers at the store.

THE GROCERY CLERK
As I pushed my cart to the check-out isle.  I began to place my items on the counter.  My items consisted of: cereal, granola bars, yoghurt, bananas, apples, arabic bread, flour tortillas, chicken, coffee creamer, milk, and pop-corn.  It's not as if I was buying a lot of food but I still couldn't shake the man from my mind.  As the clerk began to check out my items, I noticed her white collared shirt.  On her shirt was embroidered in big forest green stitching "Ministry of Labor."  I began to think of the term "Labor Workers" that is so well known in the UAE.  I always thought that the grocery stores were the ones who had hired out the clerks, bag boys, shelf stockers, and fruit and vegetable stockers.  I then began to notice all of the employees embroidery on their shirts.  The Ministry of Labor is the same organization that brings in the "labor workers" from the surrounding countries.  These include Pakistan, Indian, Bangladesh, Nepal, and the Philippines (these are just the main countries... there are a few more).  My heart began to swell up again.  Tears began to form in my eyes as the woman handed me my change from my purchase.  She smiled at me and said... "have a good evening." I blessed her and thanked the bag man twice.

THE CLEANER
As I was pushing my cart out the main door of the market.  I looked to my left and saw a man who was cleaning the floors.  He was sweeping up some of the trash.  He looked up and was gazing at a family walking by.  He was from India and I would say that he was about 20 years old.  He was just a kid.  My attention went towards the family, which were also from India.  It's quite funny but this young man actually looked so much like the family, that if it had not been for his "cleaning labor uniform" and their traditional indian wear,  I would have thought he was with them.  The family consisted of a grandmother, mother, father, and baby.  The  young man was staring at the father pushing the grocery cart.  The father was holding a baby bottle and feeding the baby who was sitting in the front seat of the grocery cart.   The mother was helping the elderly grandmother walk towards the exit.  The father's laugh echoed through the corridor of Lulu's market while he was trying to get his son to feed off of the bottle.  The young man's gaze had turned to a look of sorrow, his shoulders began to sulk, as he continued to work.  It looked as if a sense of home-sickness had hit him.  He walked away from the family with his back towards them and continued to sweep trash (that was not really there.)  He walked slowly towards the railing of the wall, memories coming to him, and homesickness over-flooding him.  I don't know how it is that I knew all of this with just one glance of the scene but I did.  As I looked upon this scene, tears began to fill my eyes again.   God was allowing me again to feel this young man's reality.  He is young man-boy who is far away from home, who came to the UAE with hopes of a better future, trying to send money home to his family but desperately homesick while doing this, not allowed to leave until his contract is fulfilled/completed (probably couldn't leave if he tried).  As I walked out the doors and into the parking garage my heart began to swell up again.  I began praying to God. "It hurts. It hurts."

THE PARKING LOT ATTENDANT 
As I made my way to my car.  I noticed a man standing by a Mercedes SUV.  It was as if he was standing there watching it but he seemed lost all the while.  He saw me walking towards him and he looked at me with an emotionless expression.  He stood there watching, waiting, for what?... maybe time to pass by.  I noticed his belly sticking out probably due to eating so much indian food, for as many indian restaurants as there are.  He continued to stand in the same spot watching/waiting.  He was on duty watching the parking garage.  As I pushed the cart to my car, which was parked right next to the Mercedes; I looked back at the parking lot attendant and then again to the Mercedes.   I couldn't help but to think of the contrast again of this city.  People who are so rich but then people who are so poor. I then focused on him, he was standing in the same place, with the same look, facing the same direction, still seeming lost.  I put my 5 bags into my backseat and pushed the cart to the spot where all the other carts had been pushed.  I got into my car, rolled my windows down, and turned my car on.  As I pulled out of my spot and drove off, I glanced at the attendant again.  He looked saddened and helpless. Or was this hopelessness?  What was his story? How did he get here? I slightly smiled at him as tears welled up in my eyes again.  Once again, God was allowing me to feel the reality.

As I drove home, I couldn't shake the feelings from the car washer, the labor worker, the grocery clerk, the cleaning man, and the parking lot attendant.  I can only explain it as if it felt like an ache or arrow in my heart.  Tears welled up and I began praying for each one.  As I walked into my apartment and placed my groceries on my floor, I continued to pray.

My soul... You are...

A phrase that I have been singing the past 2 days.  Just can't seem to get it off my heart.

"My soul ...  ....  ...
      My soul sings to You.
  You are... ... ...
      You are my Reward."

Amen

He thinks your beautiful!

Last night I had a dream.

DREAM:
I dreamed I was in this park.  I felt as if I were in Europe somewhere.  The skies were blue, grass green, there was a chill in the air.  My eyes fell on two young women and a man standing by a park bench.  The two women were working, they were prostitutes.  The man was their pimp.  The man was no more than 10 feet away from them.  I watched as the two women sat down on the bench and the man continued to stand.   I started speaking to the women, although I was quite some distance away.  I would say that I was approximately 100 feet away.   At first they wanted nothing to do with me.  The man began to get very angry with me.  He began screaming at me, but I did not fear him.  As I was speaking to them, I was praying for their deliverance and their freedom! It was like I was praying to God but speaking to them.  I felt an over-whelm of the Father's love pouring over them from Heaven! I started prophesying to them "God loves you! God loves  you! He thinks your beautiful! He thinks your beautiful!"  Immediately when I said "He thinks  your beautiful"... both of the women turned into little girls!  I watched as their adult figures shrunk into 5 year old girls! I was telling them... "The Father thinks your beautiful! Your beautiful! They began to smile with delight!  I could hear these little girls giggle!  It was as if their childhood was being restored or brought back to them.  It was as if what the enemy had stolen was being given back in full.  I began to WAR in the Spirit for their freedom and for their deliverance!

I awoke praying.

Quote of the Day

"Intercessors should be the happiest people on the planet because they know the plans of God."

 like... WWHHOOAA!!

gloom turn 2 song turn 2 love

Today I was just having a gloom day.  All day long I kept thinking of home.  Quite homesick you would say... for people & places. The weather is beginning to get warm here and I feel that spring is in the air.  The only thing is that spring in the desert is quite different than spring in America.  There are no fresh spring flowers or crisp air.  There are no rains or tulips.  I was just gloom today thinking about all of this.  I actually let it get the best of me.  On the drive home from work, there was a still silence from me.  I'm sure the girls were wondering.  I came home and did what I normally do when something is wrong.  I cleaned! My house is so clean as I type right now! The gloom did not vaporize as the dust on my floor did. :-/  I then decided to worship.  I sat down at my piano and just began to play & sing.  I worshiped for a good 2 1/2- 3 hours.  I felt Holy Spirit ministering to my heart and shaking the gloom away!  I literally felt Him wrap Himself around me as I sat there singing into Jesus Heart.  Singing of His Love.  Singing of His Faithfulness in my life.  Singing how I am dark but lovely (common phrase-I know, but so deep) As I ended, I felt light.  I felt peace. I felt love.  As I got up from my bench, I whispered into His Heart "I love You so much."

Postal Heartbeat

I just happened to be in the Emirates Post Office the other night.  For those who are familiar w/my amazon addiction, you know of my numerous p.o. box visits. I was at the check-out counter and this pakistani man walked up to the counter.  I immediately felt drawn to Him by Holy Spirit.  His appearance was clean, younger in age, and his face was emotionless.  He had come to pick up a package and was standing next to me, waiting his turn.  His eyes immediately caught mine.  I felt this immense sadness pour over me.  Lately this has been happening a lot to me. At times, its almost too hard to bare.  I know that Holy Spirit was highlighting him to me.  The postal worker spoke to him and called him by name.  He then proceeded to give him a package.  As he handed the package to him, the young pakistani man glanced at me again.  Again, I felt this immense sadness pour through every square inch of my body & pierce my heart.  I felt a sense of despair.  A sense of hopelessness.  I knew immediately that I was feeling what this man was going through.  I couldn't contain myself and I actually 'owed' in the Spirit.  The tears began to flow down my cheeks.  I felt a weep deep within.  I felt the depths of whatever it was that he was going through at the time.  The two postal workers behind the counter looked at me looking at him.  As the young pakistani man walked out of the post office, I was left behind with sorrow.  As tears rolled down my cheeks, the postal worker proceeded to help me as if nothing was going on.  As I walked out of the post office that night, I began to pray for this young man.  Somehow I knew what to pray for.   At times, I don't understand the depths of sorrow that I feel for some but I know that I am not to continue holding it.  God releases to his children gifts of discernment, so we may pray change into existence.  He doesn't want us to carry the sorrow or burden but He wants us to take partnership with Him into releasing freedom to the prisoners, the bound, and the broken hearted.  He gives us the burden to give back to Him, and in doing this releases freedom to the captives.  He wants us to take part in His Heartbeat.  

World Flags

 Random prayer walk in the cool of the night.
Walking down the street praying for businesses.
A short prayer for each light up sign.
Praying for people.
Praying for families.
Praying for Love to pour through.
This city belongs to the King.
Heart began to throb and pain.
This is how He feels but much much much worse.
Came to a business sign... "International Embroidery of World Flags."
Prayed.
Random thought ...
       "Wouldn't it be awesome if every flag that was embroidered was prayed over!"
Prayed it.
The impact those prayers could make.
To the countries.
To the Nations.
Random thought...  I don't think so.   :-)

God is with me

Last night I had a dream. I don't remember all of the details of the dream, but I do remember that wherever I went there were feathers!  I remember explaining this to people in the dream.  In the dream they were not all white feathers.  Some of them weren't fluffy & white but they were very big, texturized, and darker in color.  Thats all that I remembered of the dream.


I awoke this morning in a hurry but with a chorus in my heart "I may be weak, but your Spirit is strong in me."  I jumped up humming and rushed to get ready.  I honestly did not even have time to pray, read my bible, or make coffee.  As I was walking out my door and into the elevator I prayed for strength to get through the day.  Lets just say that not all days are easy teaching days here in the UAE.  I then made my way to the ground floor to grab a Starbucks coffee.  Yes that's right, I now have a Starbucks in my building. :-)  This could be good for my mornings but bad for my pocketbook. I just have to say... "can't put a price on happiness (famous quote from my brother).


As I walked into the Starbucks, I ordered a latte and payed for my drink.  As I was waiting in line, I saw a mutual friend of a friend.  As we were waiting for our drinks, we began to discuss work and then something very strange happened.


Here is the end of our conversation:


me: Wow!

girl: What is that?

me: (with tears in my eyes) Feathers! It's feathers! Haha!  
      (stunned as I watch them float down on us)

cashier: (looking up to the ceiling in amazement!)

girl: That's crazy! You would think there was a bird up there!

me: Maybe, Maybe not (there wasn't).

me: (Walking away feeling very very special) God is with me. :-)


As I walked away from this encounter, I was amazed at how God shows up!  It's not the feathers that are so amazing (although they are pretty cool), it's that when I pray-He hears.  It's that when I pray-He speaks.  It's that when I pray-He comes.  This is the God I love.  

Back to the Basics

This evening, I was just sitting and listening to a message/sermon from IHOP.  It was a pretty good message that definitely applies to the season that I am in.  In the middle of the message the Holy Spirit spoke a simple line to me "Back to the Basics."  I repeated "Back to the Basics" a few times.  It's very simple... Love God with all my heart.  Love God with all that I have.
Sometimes I loose sight of this and get overwhelmed with life: work, thoughts of my future, friends, studying, worship, etc.
I loose focus on the simplicity of communion.
How simple it is.  How basic it is.  It really is very simple.
I hear Jesus saying "Just love Me."

I heard this amazing quote this evening...
"Let God be my preoccupation. Let God be my love affair."
May this be my prayer.