"Nestle" from Heaven

As I pulled into the parking spot, I thought to myself "why not start at a different location." So as I put my running gear on, I began to prepare for the 6 mile run. Something about running on cool days makes my spirit come alive. :-D So I placed my IPOD on Genesis and began to treck through the book of Genesis as I ran over the hill and through the woods (and not Grandmother's house).

About half way through my jog, I realized that there was no water stand. "Oh why did I have to start at a different location?" Usually I start at the beginning of the Indian Trail and about half way through I reach my third park, which has a water rest area. It's the perfect place to rest; grab water, stretch, watch random children play, and then treck back. I was now wondering why I had started at the rest area. I guess some decisions we make can never be deciphered. See what change gets me into... thirst! About this moment, I stopped and sent up a short prayer to Heaven. I looked up and said "Oh Lord. No water. So thirsty. Help." Not thinking for much of a response to my prayer, I continued to run down the all-so-luscious-green trail.

Continuing on my journey through Genesis, I ran for about 1.2368 minutes and came across an amazing surprise! Right in the middle of the path sat a water bottle! I slowed my pace, as when putting a movie on slow motion to see a funny affect. As I slowly jogged past the water bottle, I looked at it with complete amazement! I then stopped and looked over my shoulder... "Yep, it was still there." I then began to jog backwards, as a movie being put on rewind to recapture a funny affect. As I got to the water bottle, I came to a stop or should I say "pause mode." I just stood there in amazement! I bent down to touch it to see if it was real. It was real alright, I wasn't experiencing a vision. Not only was the water bottle real, it was unopened, and cold! To top it off, the brand was "Nestle-Pure Life." Everyone knows this is the best brand, not to mention how aesthetically appealing the container is. Who would have thought that I would be in need of water, pray, and come right across 9 fl oz of purified water enhanced with minerals for taste, in which is unopened and cold to quench my thirst?

I am still wondering the odds being at this specific location, starting at a new destination, thirsting, praying for water, running upon a bottle of water, it being unopened, cold, purified at that, and most importantly the exact brand that I drink! What are the odds? What are the numbers of possibilities? You know what I say to the odds and number? Forget the odds and numbers, let’s drink!

Now whoever said that prayers are never answered?  He must love me or something. :-D

I love Thee

_________________________

Your always so patient with me
You never get fed up
With my resistibility
Your always so patient with me
… and He’s so patient with me

Your always so patient with us
Wanting none to perish
But all to come to repentance
Your always so patient with us
… and He’s so patient with you

Jesus     Jesus     Jesus

Always so patient
Wanting us to seek His Face
Always so patient
Wanting us to open the door
Wanting us to fall into His saving grace
Wanting us to fall in love

Jesus      Jesus      Jesus

Jesus I think I’m in love
Jesus I think I’m in love
Jesus I’m in love
_______________________

ache of rain

As I stood at the sliding glass door holding my groceries, I looked out upon the flooded parking lot. "It absolutely is raining 'Noah's flood' ... but where is the Ark" I thought. As I waited for the rain to calm, I couldn't help but take in my surroundings... breathing in the freshness of the rain, the sound of the thunder in the distance, and the beauty of the white lighting streaks upon the dark sky. I absolutely was in love and my heart hurt. All of a sudden I had this ache in my heart to be near Him. How I love thunderstorms and have ever since I was a little girl, but suddenly at this point in my life (beginning today it seems), they seem to bring about an ache of lovesickness. At that moment I just had this image flash into my soul...


There I was standing in the darkness of the night, standing in the middle of the rain. My head looking upward in the dark sky, and gazing into the eye of the storm. The rain was absolutely soaking me and I was loving every single drop that hit me. I raised my hands in worship. Somehow as I was drawn to the eye of the storm, it brought calmness to my soul. I stood in the center of the storm, rain pouring down upon my soul, lighting and thunder crashing around me, and I worshiped.


The rain began to let up slightly and I thought to myself  "What the heck... might as well get wet. My heart is lovesick for Him anyway." So I began to slowly walk out to my car. A precious older man offered to give me a lift to my car (who knows he might have been an angel-seemed to have a special glow about him) but I just looked up and said no-thank you and blessed him. How the rain felt soothing. I climbed into my car and as I pulled out of the 'Wall-mart' parking lot, I began to feel the ache creep up into my heart again. How much I longed for Him. How is it that I can long for a Man that I have never seen in the natural? Or maybe the natural isn't really the natural and the night-time-dream-land is really the natural? Or maybe there isn't really a natural but only the reality of my soul? I'd like to think of the latter... but someday He will surely explain it to me as I sit with Him at His table. Maybe it really won't matter when I finally get to His table. So as I drove home, I began to put a new association with the center of a storm and the center of my heart. As I pulled up to my house, I just sat in my car. Not wanting to move, not wanting to go in, wanting to be all alone with Him. As I now sit listening to the rain fall upon my window, listening to the thunder come crashing down, all I can think about is how much my heart aches. It's true. I am lovesick for a Beautiful Man. When can I be with Him? When?

Holy Spirit in the MAC aisle

As I walked into the Macy's entrance, I stopped while taking a long inhale of the perfumed fragrance. One of my favorite smells is the aroma of a department store's perfume counter. While taking in the aroma, I thought to myself "I wonder if this is what Heaven smells like?" I can probably almost guarantee that Heaven smells much greater than the perfume counter of a department store but if I had to pick a smell, well this would be it. As I began to meander my way through the maze of perfume and makeup counters, I somehow found my way to the MAC counter. Who would have figured right? I knew that I had come to the counter only to buy mascara. I tend to easily get distracted by the trendy new and bright shadows and shades that MAC is all so infamous for. Girls I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. So I had to just keep reminding myself "I am only in here for mascara... I am only in here for mascara... I am only in here for mascara."

As I began to mingle through the MAC section, I of course found my way to the shadow not mascara plank. I was admiring the new Liberty of London Eye Shadow which is a turquoise shadow with a slight hint of gold sparkles that seemed to paint across the small circular glossy white plastic container. To top it off it was the limited edition and it had an exclusively created floral motif. It was at this very moment that the beautiful MAC sales associate asked if she could be of assistance. This brought me back to my original mission. I replied to the young woman (who's eye makeup just happened to be of perfection), "I am only in here for mascara." I told her that I wanted the High Definition Mascara." She then proceeded to tell me about the Liberty of London Limited Edition Eye Shadow that had just been released. I told her again "I am only in here for mascara." Then smiling at me, she said that she would be just a few moments with my purchase. As she began to walk to the stock wall full of mascaras, I heard this still small voice within me say "the green one... tell her it's the green container." I then began to speak within my spirit to the still small voice, "I told her it was the High Definition, and she should know that it's the green one."

As I proceeded to check out, she bagged up my small purchase into the very modern translucent MAC bag. We all know that carrying a MAC bag is part of the MAC purchase experience and one should always reach for the high tech bag even if it's a small purchase. As I began to meander my way through the Macy's maze toward the exit, I heard this still small voice within myself once again. The voice said... "Check your bag." Once again I responded within my spirit... "Check my bag? Why should I check my bag? I made the right purchase. Is that really You speaking?" To tell you all the truth, I was beginning to feel the onset of conviction for spending so much money on a measly little green plastic stick of mascara. I believe that I ignored the still small voice within myself because I felt a little silly for spending so much on the purchase. (Just for future reference, I do not recommend ignoring the still small voice.) Although I did have to rejoice because I did only go into the MAC store with one mission and I came out of the MAC store with only one purchase. So it seems that the infamous MAC store has before been one of my weaknesses. I just have to say "the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak." So as I was leaving the store I thought to myself "mission accomplished" or so I thought. Just before pushing the Macy doors open, I stopped to inhale once more the almost therapeutic aroma of what I thought Heaven might smell like.

That night when coming home, I threw my purchase upon my bed and still refused to check my bag. The next day as I reached into the MAC bag to begin to apply my High Definition Mascara, I saw something very peculiar. This famous green container of mascara was not green at all but the container was black! I had bought the wrong container of mascara, it was Studio Fix Lash not High Definition Lash. I must say that I was not at all a fan of the lash brush. I then began to retrace what the still small voice had spoken to me. I then began to laugh until I had tears in my eyes. Oh how much I love Holy Spirit. He concerns Himself in every activity of our lives, even in the little ones that consist of our purchases that we shouldn't really even be making. Even through my stubbornness or should I say convicting spirit, Holy Spirit cares and intervenes. I am reminded of Psalm 139:7 "Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? Even in the Mac aisle You are there." (emphasis added)

God wears a white t-shirt

Tonight at church I had a question pierce into my mind.  I was worshiping and I just imagined my words being sung directly into the actual Heart of God.  To be precise I had a vision of my words leaving my heart, going up and out upon my lips, and going into the Father's heart.  What is strange is that I could not see His heart.  As I sang, I stood in front of a Man and His chest was directly parallel to my face.  I sang directly into His chest and had the urge to just want to lean over and rest my head upon His chest.  I just stood there staring at His white t-shirt.  Yes, He was wearing a white t-shirt! :-D  All I saw on Him was the very center of His chest, I could not see anything else.  My focus was sure, I was after His heart.  I desired to see His heart.  What I was going to do with it when I saw it, I do not know.  I am a very visual person and when doing something I usually have to visualize it to get the full impact of what I am doing.  As I sung into the Father's heart I tried to invision it.  I'm sorry to say that I could not see His heart.  As the music came to an end, I longed for my question to be answered...   "What does God's heart look like?"  As I sit here late in the evening, my heart is burning to see.

He loves me with His Love

_________________________________________________

I love those hands
I love those feet
I love the crown...   the crown of His righteousness


But what takes me back...   takes me back...   takes me back...
What captivates my heart
is His love...   His love for me


The King of love
The King of love
The King of all love is here


I love Your hands
I love Your feet
I love Your crown...   Your crown of all righteousness


But what takes me back...   takes me back...   takes me back...
What captivates my heart
is Your unending love for me


You love me...   You love me...   You love me unconditionally


You love me in my sin
You love me in my darkness of heart
You love me even through my own self abandonment


What takes me back... takes me back... takes me back...
what captivates my heart
is that You could ever love me


The King of love
The King of love
The King of all love is here

It's in those hands and in those feet that Your love beckons me

You love me with Your Love... His name is Jesus
_______________________________________________

Chorus from Heaven

I had a funny dream the other night.  I dreamed I was walking with a man on a city street.  Although it was in the city, we seemed to be the only ones on the street.  As we were walking I looked up at him and was surprised at his height.  I just remember thinking in my mind "Wow! You're tall... too tall! You are so different than from me."  He seemed to be around 6 '4' or 6 '5' in height, which is quite the difference from my 5 ft petite frame.  All of a sudden I heard this beautiful voice from heaven singing 2 lines, whether this was the Lord or one of His angels I do not know. 

The chorus went like this...

"I wanna go deeper and deeper and deeper cause opposites attract. 
I wanna go deeper and deeper and deeper and fall more in love with You."

Then I woke up.

I have been thinking about this encounter and I can't get this tune out of my mind.  I just keep singing it over and over and over.  I'm not sure this dream is directly pointing me to my future spouse but I am adiment about the idea that just as this man's stature was the opposite of mine, that the Lord's stature of who He is- is as also.  I mean yes, I am made to be or try to follow in the image of Christ but as much as I try to suceed I never quite make it. Simply said... I am broken.  I fall too many times.  I am the opposite of Him.  He is strong and tall and perfect.  I am weak and little and imperfect.  He is perfect inside and out.  I am not.  He is so independent and I am so needy and dependent on Him.  He is Love.  I am not.  It is fair enough to say that we are opposites.  What's great about all this?  Well although we are opposites, He is attracted to me.

Although I am dark, He thinks I am lovely.
Although I am imperfect, He still chooses to woo me.
Although I am weak, He gives me His strength.
Although I am none like Him, He wants me. 

He is after my heart. His desire is for me and mine for Him.  Yes, it is true.  We are none alike but as the saying goes, even in Heaven... Hahaha... "Opposites attract."

The Way to Love

I just wanna love You
more and more and more
Every day of my life

I don't wanna take another unexpected detour
I don't wanna slide off and onto another beaten path

So many questions in life we seem to ask...
Should I stay or should I go
Should I do this or should I do that
Should I go here or should I go there

I just wanna love You
more and more and more
Every day of my life
With every beat of my heart
With every breath that I take
I was made to love You

All so many times I'm easily distracted
Distracted by meaningless things that take home in my heart
Meaningless things that can be consuming but end in a whirlwind of nothing

Show me The Way in my weakness
Show me The Way in Your Strength

I just wanna love You
more and more and more
Every day of my life
With every beat of my heart
With every breath that I take
I was made to love You

This road seems so winding
At times so narrow but never too wide
All too many people are called
But only  few are chosen

For You spoke...
"Wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction
and narrow is the gate and difficult is the way that leads to life."

Lord Jesus help me stay on the right Way
The only Way I belong on is the road that ends in You
Help me find The Way to Love
Help me find The Way to You

Matthew 7:13-14, John 14

As I was driving to work, I began to sing a prayer.  This is what prayer came from my heart.

something new today

Easily stuck in routine. Easily bored with usual ways.
Easily routinely bored and this even becomes another routine that seems the same.
Why not try something new today?

Isn't it funny how normal ways and even your so called "normal day" becomes a vicious cycle? So many things can seem the same down to the 'T'... unless you take a different letter for change.  Here are a few usual ways:

1. The time your alarm goes off in the morning and even the amount of times that are programmed in to allow you to hit the snooze button. Why not get up a few minutes earlier or later, depending on your wake and take?
2. The side of the refrigerator that you keep the milk... and even the kind of milk (skim, 1%, 2%, D).  I still say that I prefer 2% over anything but what does 1% less or more change anyway? Don't even get me started on the consistency of skim! Also, why not go to the right of your roomies carton instead of placing it to left? Why only drink 1 glass?  I say go for seconds.
3. The route you take to work and your normal parking spot. How about going the other way around the block and parking a few slots further for more heart exercise or depending on the severity of the winter bliss, a few spaces closer to avoid your nostrils becoming  frozen together? Sound familiar?
4. The seat you decide to take in the prayer room. Take a risk and sit by someone new since you already know that you'll be in the all to infamous "prayer room play stage" ... plus you never did talk to the old neighbor in the first place. This does not include moving locations due to an individual who is oblivious to any of their seat neighbors while all the time continuously screaming unto the Lord at 29.86434 million sound decimals..Take a risk and move on your own behalf and not just by being forced out by inconsistant sound waves.
5. The way you create your lunch sandwiches. Why not go for the pepper-jack instead of the colby?Might as well add some spice to your life. If that's not hot enough go for the jalapeños! If your feeling a little risky, why not scrape off the lunch sides from the plate and load it all together in one big massive heap of a sandwich? That's what I call a meanwich!
6.  *The purchase of the famous 'mocha madness protein shake' after a really strenuous workout. How about going for the fruit instead of the chocolate? A little fruit never heart. If you want to step it up a notch and still keep the chocolate, how about adding espresso? Ummm... yummy and it's still out of the ordinary and healthy! :-D
7. The route taken home in the evening after a long day. How about trying to find a new way home each time your coming from a different location? It wouldn't hurt to learn the roads more if your not originally a local and if you get lost then you can use the awesome "God's Prophetic tracking System" (GPS). I do say this is one of the best gifts I have received (except for Eternity of course).

All this to say, that I did something new today. I woke up at a random time and it was not on a 5. I put my milk in a random spot and I parked in a 1 hour spot. Thank God I didn't get towed. I added a little spice to my sandwich and made it hot. As I was ordering my shake this evening I decided that I needed a change, I was bored with my everyday same. So I went for the strawberries and bananas. Although it was not as great as the Chocolate I must say, my soul was happy with the new partake. As I drove home tonight, I thought okay this has to be allright but I'm still bored with the same old-same old drive. I wish I could say that I took another way, but I've already tried every other route. Still all this to say, that I did something new today. What will tomorrow bring?

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Have you ever just had one of those days where you just can't shake off the 'bad mood' attitude? Yesterday seemed to be this day. I usually have a pretty happy-go-lucky personality but yesterday one who was around me probably would not have referred to me as having a peaceful personality type. I don't know what the deal was but the whole day was a big 'uncomfortable situation.' It just seemed that I found so many things to be ungrateful for.

Complaint 1:  I was out of toothpaste.

Complaint 2:  I was very very very hungry and praying for grace to get through the day.

Complaint 3 & 4:  As I went about my day, I grew very frustrated with the coldness of my classroom and became agitated beyond measure with my students. It seemed to be that the heater was not working properly in my classroom and even the students were wearing their winter coats. None of the students seemed to be following directions and they just were loud beyond measure. Hmmm... who would have guessed that second graders talked so much?

Complaint 5:   Then I was stuck behind cars that seemed to be afraid to do the actual speed limit.  You know... there are posted limits on signs for reasons.

Complaint 6: Then the coffee shop seemed to forget my 'toffee nut' flavoring in my Americano.

Complaint 7 & 8 & 9: Then I went to the FCS-renewal meeting at IHOP and as I walked through the door, I was quickly swept away like a sardine in a trial sized aluminum can. I felt like I couldn't breath and quickly became closterphobic and easily agitated with people-mostly students, who were showing any presence of a manifestation of the Spirit. I mean really... who makes any noise or movement when the Holy Spirit is upon them anyway? After walking around the building for about a half hour, I finally found a seat but only to be crawled over and upon about every 5 minutes by hot-sweaty-smelly bodies trying to make their way to and fro the front of the stage.

Complaint 10:  I was having a very bad day.

Believe it or not a PRAISE crept in:  During the FSF service, there was yet another call for healing. I felt that I was especially not in the right mood or mind of sanity to pray for healing. I think I was the one who was in desperate need of healing.  I specifically told the Lord how I felt and about my stubborn mood.  I should've expected a suddenly but I didn't.  The woman who was sitting next to me just happened stand up for healing. I felt as if I was required to pray for her. I assumed this was the Spirit leading me to pray because in my stage or frame of mind there was no possibility of any sort of elegance coming from my mouth in prayer... nope nothing else but Him (isn't this how it should always be anyway?) There was also a man praying over her. He was using a lot of big words and very expressive motions but quickly left her when his prayer ended. I grouchily prayed "Lord bring your healing and bring her body back into alignment." The Spirit then pressed it into my mind that it was caused by an injury. I then prayed (grouchily of course) "bring healing over any past injuries that her body has endured for You-Lord are worthy of her praise and worthy of her thanksgiving." Nothing outrightly seemed to happen and I sat down while trying not to focus on the crowded auditorium. She sat down next to me for about 10 minutes and then disappeared into the crowd. All of a sudden she appeared on stage and proclaimed that the Lord had healed her hips!!! She had just had a baby and had been struggling with her hips being out of alignment. When we were praying for her they popped back into place! I just sat there mystified and thankful that the Lord is so faithful! Even through my own stubbornness and grouchiness, He still worked through my prayer! I now say to myself... of course He did because it's not any power that I posses on my own that can bring healing. It's actually the Spirit dwelling within me and the power of God that brings healing. He is always faithful although I am not, He is always loving although I am not, He is always full of mercy and I am not, and He is always Big and Powerful and I am simply small, weak, sometimes irritable, and all too needy.

As I left the FSF service, still in a somewhat grouchy mood (def. 'dark but lovely') I was reminded of how faithful God truly is. I was realizing how big of a ‘brat’ I had been this day, but I was more focused and amazed at how awesome He was and is. I am so thankful that He is not anything like me, although I am praying daily to be more like Him. When He wants to work and bring healing, He doesn’t ask you to come and pray in a happy mood, without sin, or without agitation. He simply says “come as You are.” “Come to My house of praise just as you are.”

He is all together lovely. This is my faithful friend. This is my God.


More Praises: 

1. I am thankful for toothpaste that is free of diethylene glycol (a chemical in antifreeze).  Warning for the reader... do not buy toothpaste made in China it could be hazardous to your health.  Buy Crest it's the best.
2. I am thankful for having a job, while because of the economy so many do not right now. 
3. I am thankful for having a school to teach out of, while some schools are not left standing, let alone having children that are alive (Haiti). 
4. I am thankful for students who are proficient in the english language, even if they speak some Swahili on the side or in the halls. :-D 
5. I am thankful for living in a country that has equal rights for women, while some countries don't allow women to drive, let alone the other equality determining factors that affect their lives. (Martin had a dream for a reason.)
6. I am thankful for COFFEE!  Yes, I believe there will be coffee in Heaven!  Although God has told me that I won't be addicted to it in Heaven.
7. I am thankful for a wonderful Church that truly believes and lives out the Word of God.  I am thankful for the teachings that have been instilled in my heart. 
8. I am thankful for the church buildings and prayer rooms that we have, while some countries are not as fortunate.
9. I am thankful for the freedom to speak of Christ, the freedom to worship, and the freedom to evangelize and teach about Christ.
10. Last but most importantly, I am thankful for a God who loves, heals, and saves.

I am randomly reminded of one of my favorite children's books... "Alaxander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day."  Maybe next time, I will move to Australia. :-D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p09_ULvFBlA  (online play-book)